The Gottman Method for Couples Therapy
How The Gottman Method for Couples Therapy can help
69% of all conflicts between couples are perpetual and unresolvable. But what makes couples stay together is being able understand each other, being able to come to a compromise, learning to deal with a fight effectively (even after the fight), and being able to still share laughter, excitement, and admiration for each other.
Here's how The Gottman Method can help:
Improving communication
Managing conflict and getting unstuck in a chronic conflict
Increasing empathy and understanding
Deepening emotional connection
Strengthening friendship
Increasing intimacy and sexual satisfaction
Fostering respect and affection
Developing trust and commitment
Learning to problem solve and compromise
Healing from betrayals, affairs, and infidelity
Managing external influences such as ex-partners and in-laws
Adjusting to parenthood and parenting
Prioritize your relationship
Ready to work on your relationship?
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Three Phases of The Gottman Method
Part 1: Relationship assessment
Session 1: Intake Interviews (75 mins). The therapist will meet with the couples and gather information about the history of the relationships, family history, and engaging in a conflict interaction. You will be sent home with questionnaire to complete before the individual sessions.
Session 2 & 3: Individual Interviews (40 mins each). The therapist will meet with both partners individually to gather personal history, family history, personal goals, hopes, fears, and expectations.
Session 4: Treatment Planning (75 mins). We will reconvene as a couple and the therapist will go over treatment planning and discussion of the result of the assessment. The therapist will introduce skills training and intervention exercises.
Part 2: Couples Therapy
Therapy sessions are 75 mins long. After the relationship assessment, the couple will be able to decide how often they would need therapy based on their needs and goals. Therapy is structured and skills- based. Couples are provided with handouts of skills and exercises to yield better results. You will get a chance to practice the skills in session and at home.
Part 3: “Phasing out” of Therapy, Termination, Outcome Evaluation
When you feel your goals are met and are satisfied with the progress, the therapist and the couple will meet less frequently to test out the new relationship skills. Couples find it beneficial to come for “refresher” sessions at the 6 month, 12 month, 18 month mark, and after 2 years mark. This is to fine-tune the skills learnt and to determine the effectiveness of the skills.
How is The Gottman Method different
Extensive research
With over 40 years of research with over 3000 couples, Drs. John and Julie Gottman developed The Gottman Method for couples counselling that is grounded The Sound Relationship House.
Comprehensive assessment
In the first 3 sessions, we gather as much information about your relationship and personal and family histories to come up with a treatment plan. Think of it as if you were to go to the doctor's for stomach pain and they give you an injection without doing any tests, you’d be worried. Similarly, we require assessment done prior to moving into therapy.
Dyadic sessions
You will be able to use the skills you learn even outside of the therapy sessions. When you are home, the therapist will not be with you. As such, the skills are meant to help you even when the therapist is not present.
Follow ups after couples therapy
After you decide to terminate couples therapy, we still follow-up with you (if you want). We want to ensure the skills you have learned are still effective and are helping you.